Hey Josh

Hey You, I need new friends

Dearest Advice Mafia,

Keri needs your advice. Hook it up. Thanks!

// josh

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Hey Josh,

So heres the d/l. I’m a junior in college, I play rugby, i’m a R.A, and very involved around campus. However, I’ve moved aroud alot and i have a lot of friends, but i don’t really have any close friends i can relate to.

I’m not exactly down for the whole let’s go out and get crapfaced and be hung over for class thing. What is the best way to get past the “Hey what’s up, see ya” too….”Oh my gosh let my people call your people and we’ll do lunch and stuff.”

yezzzir. Thanks and Love.

Keri

VOTE NOW: Hey Josh Community Service Project

Thank you to everyone who submitted ideas for the first ever HEY JOSH community service project.

Please vote below for your favorite idea and then we shall knock it out.

Bombard Random Person with Thank You Emails

* I’m thinking we find a random person and wish them happy birthday. Or say thanks to a teacher who really makes a difference…something like that.

Save the Goats!

* We would promote www.worldwildlife.org via our FaceBook status, etc and encourage people to adopt an animal and promote awareness for this cause.

School Supplies for Foster Kids

* This idea actually came from my foster mom.  We all have school supplies we don’t use or need…give them to someone who can use em.

Voting will last for one week. Get on it.

shank you pencil. shank you animation. domo arigato, mr. roboto.

// josh

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Hey Josh, Am I a jerk?

Hey Josh,

Some of my friends say that i can be mean and inconsiderate some times. my plan is to try and be nicer to ppl but thinking back on it…lots of my jokes are kinda mean and i never even thought about it till now, but because this comes natural to me idk what to do/say to ppl so that im nicer.

hope u can help :P

Matt
Read more…

Thank You Harry Ainlay HS!

One of my friends…upon hearing I was traveling to speak in Alberta, Canada actually uttered the following

“Well that’s cool man, but will you have a translator?”

I keep good company.

I had a great day at said high school.  It’s a great school and the students are gifted haiku-ers as well.

I spotted the following on the stage behind me

PUT THE FUNK IN THE DUNK.

All schools should aspire to be so moving in their sports related poetry.

Give my best to the plant I left behind on New Caprica.  (huh?) exactly.

Here’s the videos I referenced today:

DATING VIDEO: http://www.heyjosh.com/date

BREAK UP VIDEO: http://www.heyjosh.com/breakup

Good evening.

// josh

The HEY JOSH Community Service Project

I have an idea. But I need your help.

I’ve been thinking about the idea of us (me, you, the random HEY JOSH fan in Switzerland- hi Lukas) doing a community service project together.  But completely online.

I’ve got a few ideas, but nothing is really slapping me in the face with brilliance at the moment.

Maybe we could….

Flood somebody with Happy Birthday Emails
eBay our used sweaters and give the money to a good cause
Write letters to a random elementary school class

I would love to hear your ideas.  What could we do? I’d like it to be something fun, easy, and that would make a difference.

Here’s how it will work.

1. You comment below with brilliant ideas.
2. After a week of submissions, I’ll pick out three ideas.
3. We shall vote.
4. We shall do.

Legit.

// josh

Hey You, What is love?

Dearest Hey Josh reader-awesome-person-who-bathes-regularly,

Sometimes I get asked a question, and although I’m happy to sling my advice in their general direction…I feel like what they really need is a variety of opinions/thoughts/advice.  Presenting: HEY YOU.

From time to time, I shall toss an email or topic up on this website-of-glory… And ask for your advice.  This is such an instance. Game on.

Hey Josh,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a month now, and we both feel a pretty deep connection (not to be cliche or anything), but we think it’s love…but we’re not sure either.

We’ve talked it over sooo many times, but we still haven’t figured it out. There’s definitley something there, but it’s only been an extremely short amount of time and also have no idea what love actually is.

It’s also reallly really frustrating not knowing if is or not. So yea…
What is love, question mark question mark question mark?

Angela

The V-Day Gift Giving Matrix

I’m reposting a lil something I brewed up for my friends at I HEART DAILY.  BTW- if you’re of the female species and don’t subscribe to I HEART DAILY, I fear for your livelihood.  Behold.

Ladies,

Valentine’s day is quickly approaching and I’ve heard that some of you are confused as to whether or not it’s too soon to bestow a gift upon your beloved.  Fear Not. I have designed a simple graph that will answer all of your questions.

Just started dating.  He forgets how to spell your name.  Get him a card at least.

He verbally confirms you are his girlfriend in a group of peers. VICTORY!

He makes awkward statements about things he’s “feeling” for you.  Then blames feelings on lunch.

His mother loves you because now that he’s in a ‘relationship’ he showers regularly.

You know he’s deathly afraid of jell-o and he still sleeps with his baby blanket.  Aww…

Read more…

An open advice letter to Michael Phelps

Michael,

This is Hey Josh. I’m like Dr. Phil only not bald, and slightly less angry.

Are you out of your dang mind!? It’s true that you didn’t pull a “Plaxico” and walk into a night club and shoot yourself in the thigh or spend the week in prison for assaulting your mom with fast food. But let’s face it the bar is set a little higher for you bro. Last summer your eight gold metals even inspired me to put on my water wings.

Furthermore, it inspired me to Chuck Norris your awesomeness:  “Michael Phelps doesn’t swim through water, water swims through Michael Phelps.”

But now there is a photo floating around the internet with you and old Aunt Mary. This is not good.

Here’s my advice:

Don’t smoke pot.
Don’t get photographed smoking pot.
Admit your mistake and move on.

In your defense, I do think Kellogs dropping their sponsorship is a big mistake, considering a large portion of their customers are fending off the munchies.

Phelps for listening,

Hey Josh

Hey You: What are your thoughts on Michael Phelps & Bonggate?  What do you think of Kellog’s decision?

Hey Ladies, Your Guys need some V-Day advice…

Some guys think Valentine’s Day is ‘just another date’.  However, here at Hey Josh (dot com!) we know that Valentine’s Day is a perfect opportunity for your guy to express how he feels about you, create the perfect date or to just go deeper into debt because he thinks a fancy restaurant makes up for a lack of planning.  (That’ll help the economy)

So, Ladies – Can YOU offer some advice about what is MOST important to you on a Valentine’s date?  This will really help out our guys who are going to start thinking about what they’ll do the night before.  (sorry guys… but it’s true, isn’t it?)

I thank you.
The male species thanks you.
These guys mothers who raised them to know better thanks you.

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Hey Josh, She is always busy

Hey Josh,

So i went out with this one girl and then she dumped me right. The thing is i still really like her and i wanna get back together with her but she said that we never talk and barely hang out which it true but i try to talk to her but shes always busy and never had time for me when we were going out.

I don’t know what to do? Please help.

James
Read more…