Hey Josh » family

Advice Show 015 // Self Pity, Losing Dad, and Googling Yourself

josh — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 19:00:43 +0000

Happy Thanksgiving Day’s Eve, grateful young humans! Allow me to present Advice Show Episode 015 for your enjoyment and edification. Yeah, I know what you really want right now is several healthy helpings of pumpkin pie and mug of hot cider, but you’ll have to wait until tomorrow. (Hey, don’t blame me; I’m not cooking your dinner.) In the meantime, Jessica needs advice on helping out a friend who feels really sorry for herself and Rachelle is struggling with losing her dad and isn’t ready to handle her mom’s new boyfriend. Let’s see if we can help:

And that’s my take; I’d love to hear yours. What have YOU done to help pull people out of their pity parties? Or maybe you’ve lost a parent and can relate to Rachelle. How did you respond? What can Rachelle learn from your experience?

Keep it real, everybody.

Peace, love, and a turkey,

// josh

P.S. Priscilla, you’re photo wasn’t embarrassing. You look great, honestly. Tanline schmanline. Anyway, thanks for sending it to me; it was great to have you on the show. I hope you find a lovely prom date. The rest of you, send your actually embarrassing childhood photos to josh@heyjosh.com.

Advice Show 011 // College, Goals, Pregnancy, and Truth Telling

josh — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 18:00:42 +0000

Episode 011! Jess wants to write a book and be an artist, but her parents think that’s waste of time and want her to go to college…but the thought of college makes Jess panic. What to do? In other email, JD and his fiance are pregnant but don’t want his parents or her grandparents to find out. I serve ‘em each a savory morsel of wisdom, so sink your teeth into this:

And now, my young apprenti (I’ve decided to make “apprenti” the plural form of “apprentice” instead of “apprentices” because, well, I think it sounds cooler), let’s hear YOUR advice for Jess and JD. What are some of the lessons you’ve learned about planning for your future and/or telling the truth even when it hurts?

Until next time,

// josh

P.S. Jaimie, thanks for sharing your toothless childhood smile with me. I found it both heartwarming and humorous. The rest of you…let’s see what you’ve got. Send your embarrassing childhood photos to josh@heyhosh.com.

Advice Show 009 // Frienemies, Mom’s New Boyfriend, and Talking It Out

josh — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 18:00:54 +0000

Yo. It’s Josh Shipp, dropping in with Episode 009. Word on the street/email is Tessa’s being pestered by a pointlessly competitive, copy-cat frienemy and Alyssa’s canned emotions are causing her to distance herself from friends and family. These kind folks asked for my advice…and I kindly obliged. Behold:

Alright, young earthling—time for a little personal reflection. One way or another, I’m guessing you’ve dealt with these issues in your own life, so I’d love to hear what you’ve learned in the process (as would Tessa and Alyssa). We’ve all been on both sides of the “monkey see, monkey do” imitation game, and we’ve all canned up our emotions and made ourselves miserable. What’s YOUR solution? How have you opened up to friends and family about stuff you really didn’t want to talk about? Or, if you’ve been in Tessa’s shoes, have you ever tried to help people who annoy you and, if so, how did that worked out for you?

Pardon all the questions—I’m feeling inquisitive today, I guess. If you’d rather ask a question than answer one, that’s cool, too. Bring it on.

Later,

// josh

P.S. Hey, Kristen! It’s been good seeing you and your crazy Bubba teeth in my frame—it helps remind me to brush and floss regularly. The rest of you…I imagine I’ll be seeing your embarrassing childhood photos arriving in my email inbox any day now. Please direct your photos to josh@heyjosh.com.

Advice Show 005 // Stalker Friends, Angry Moms, and Cow Costumes

josh — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 18:00:30 +0000

Episode 005 coming at you with splendor. Isabella doesn’t know what to do about her best guy-friend who’s acting like a creeper and Megan’s having some trouble with her mom and wants to run away. But fear not, young human! Your chia-pet-haired hero and his trustworthy owl sidekick come to their rescue:

And now…I punt to you: what’s YOUR advice for Isabella and Megan? Share your experience, insights, and tasty tidbits of life-giving wisdom in the comments section below.

Until next time,

// josh

P.S. Let us not forget to give Alica a well-earned pat on the back for sending in a picture of herself all gussied up as a cow. You’ve earned your place in the frame of fame. As for the rest of you…be honest, you have pictures of yourself dressed up as My Little Pony. Send your embarrassing childhood photos to josh@heyjosh.com

Hey Josh, I’m Having Problems With My Parents

josh — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 13:43:46 +0000

I get a lot of emails from teens and twenty somethings who spill their guts to me and ask for my advice. It’s flattering. It’s humbling. It’s exhilarating. It keeps me up at night and inspires me to get up in the morning. And sometimes it just downright breaks my heart.

Like this.

A girl recently sent me a request for advice on YouTube. I asked her if it would be cool if I shared the vid with you. She said, “Indeed.”

This makes me sad for two reasons:

1// She’s going through this

2// A LOT of you are going through this

People ask me “How can I deal with my parents?” all the time, and it’s not an easy question. I know—I dealt with twelve different sets of parents growing up in foster care. Anyway, hold on to your socks for an in-depth look at this issue coming in the near future. In the meantime, here’s my response back to Kiley—I share it with you b/c it’s what I’d tell you if you had the same problem:

Hey there,

Sorry about your situation. My advice would be to focus on what you DO have, instead of what you DON’T have.

You DO have friends who care about you.

Love you.
Respect you.
Want you.

If your parents don’t feel like way (which is crazy) that is their problem. I wish I could give you some secret advice to make your parents change.

***BUT I CAN’T***

So this is a situation where the only thing you have control over is how you react.

You are a valuable person. And lovable. If your parents truly don’t see that, it’s their loss. Not yours.

// josh

P.S. May I put your video on heyjosh.com? I think a lot of teens could relate to your situation.

I also asked for some advice from a few friends of mine on her situation. Here’s what they brought to the table:

Advice from bvantil:

Hey Kiley, you seem like a great person, and that your family life is in a ‘valley’ right now. Be sure you take the time to sit them down one on one and explain how you feel, but be sure to ask what’s going on with THEM—you may be surprised at why they’re acting the way they are…and it’s okay to confide (and vent) to your friends (that’s what friends are for!

Advice from melissacwalker:

Aw, Kiley. Find the people who value you—your friends, the people you CHOOSE to have in your life—and stick with them. Let them build you up, and focus on that.

So, what’s YOUR take? Two things I’m wondering:

Firstly, if you’ve been through something like this, how have you dealt with it? What did you learn from it? What worked? What didn’t? Second, what advice would you give to her/someone like her?

In your face, but on your side.

// josh

Hey You, My Parents are Getting Divorced

josh — Fri, 22 May 2009 17:43:40 +0000

Hey there,

Let’s be honest. Divorce sucks. Especially when it’s happening in your own family. If you’ve dealt with the divorce of your parents or have helped a friend work through it, sling some advice to Taryn to help her get through this difficult time.

// josh

—

Hey Josh,

My worst fear is currently coming true. About a month ago my parents told me that they were getting a divorce. I have been terrified of that happening ever since I was about 4 years old. I’m stressed and don’t want to have to choose which parent to go with.

I need help. What do I do?

-Taryn

Hey You, My Parents Don’t Support Me

Hey Josh Team — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 13:13:40 +0000

Got some advice for Rose? Fire away!

// josh

—

Hey Josh,

I’m 14 years old and I absolutely LOVE acting. Acting is my favorite thing to do. The problem is: my parents don’t support me in the slightest. In fact, they often try to talk me out of acting, saying how awful and terrible it is.

The frustrating thing is that my little brother is allowed to act all he wants and my parents support him 100%. They let him audition in the city and even got him an agent, but they won’t even consider it with me. The reason they support him is because he’s really good at acting. Me? I’m not bad. I’m only ok though.

It’s bad enough that my parents let my brother act and give him support, but they also compare us in public to anyone that will listen…to other actors, to friends, to waiters. They talk about how he was born to act and he’s so amazing and that “it’s just not the same with me” and that I’m only ok at acting. The way they talk about him, you’d think he was the next Gene Kelly.

I tried talking to them about this several times in a very polite and mature fashion. I’ve tried different things including writing them a letter and sitting down with them twice to talk about it. But this seems to be a touchy subject because every time I bring it up, they start yelling and screaming at me, making me feel awful.

I don’t know what to do anymore. They just won’t listen, they don’t understand. What do you do about something like this when your parents are beyond reason??

Rose

Hey You, Should I Try to Find my brother?

Hey Josh Team — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 11:05:38 +0000

Hey there,

Fancy meeting you here. I bring you a very special edition of ‘Hey You’ featuring Nathan and his newly discovered biological brother.

In personal news, I recently found and reconnected with my biological father. You can read about it here.

Pass your newly discovered wisdom onto Nathan and have a rad day!

// josh

Hey Josh,

My mom recently told me that I have a half brother that was given up for adoption and I don’t know what to do. I’m happy because I think it might be cool to have an older brother, but then again I have no idea who he is, who adopted him, who the father is, or if he’s a good person. He’s my brother but no more than a stranger to me at the same time.

What’s bothering me the most is that it could’ve happened to me but it didn’t. Please help. What do you think I should do?

-Nathan